Martha Beck
Author
1962-11-29
Books by Martha Beck
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Quotes by Martha Beck
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If you're living completely on your own, break out of solitary confinement. Seek to understand others, and help them understand you.
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If you're living completely on your own, break out of solitary confinement. Seek to understand others, and help them understand you.
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Anger elicits anger, fear elicits fear, no matter how well meaning we may be.
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Absolutely lonely people have few personal interactions of any kind.
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We virtually never feel our age, but thinking that we should can lead to disaster.
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Although beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, the feeling of being beautiful exists solely in the mind of the beheld.
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If you're living completely on your own, break out of solitary confinement. Seek to understand others, and help them understand you.
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Self-improvement books, friends, and polite strangers often tell soothing lies about our physical appearance that prevent many of us from facing, discussing, and solving our real problems.
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Polite strangers often tell soothing lies about our physical appearance that prevent many of us from facing, discussing and solving our real problems.
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There are several ways to mess up your life by fighting to make your calendar age match your felt age. I live in the Southwest, a part of the country with more than its share of fair skies, material wealth, and people who are trying not to be as old as they are.
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No one else can take risks for us, or face our losses on our behalf, or give us self-esteem. No one can spare us from life's slings and arrows, and when death comes, we meet it alone.
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I don't believe that there are no spiritual beings around us. I don't know what to call them, I don't know how they work. But I know they're there.
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Allowing children to show their guilt, show their grief, show their anger, takes the sting out of the situation.
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Self-pity, a dominant characteristic of sociopaths, is also the characteristic that differentiates heroic storytelling from psychological rumination. When you talk about your experiences to shed light, you may feel wrenching pain, grief, anger, or shame. Your audience may pity you, but not because you want them to.
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The most common reason we stumble into the delusion of powerlessness is that we're afraid of what other people would do or say or feel if we were to act as we wanted.
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Caring for your inner child has a powerful and surprisingly quick result: Do it and the child heals.
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To really boost your sense of self-efficacy, think of ways you could modify your usual tasks to suit your personal style.
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Much protective self-criticism stems from growing up around people who wouldn't or couldn't love you, and it's likely they still can't or won't. In general, however, the more you let go of the tedious delusion of your own unattractiveness, the easier it will be for others to connect with you, and the more accepted you'll feel.
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Ten years ago, I still feared loss enough to abandon myself in order to keep things stable. I'd smile when I was sad, pretend to like people who appalled me. What I now know is that losses aren't cataclysmic if they teach the heart and soul their natural cycle of breaking and healing.
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I practice staying calm all the time, beginning with situations that aren't tense.
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