Ricky Gervais
Comedian
1961-06-25
English comedian, writer, actor, and producer best known for cocreating and starring in the original UK version of The Office. He also created and starred in Extras, Derek, and After Life.
Quotes by Ricky Gervais
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A Christian telling an atheist they're going to hell is as scary as a child telling an adult they're not getting any presents from Santa.
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In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth . . . Then he said, Let there be light. Which means he made the entire universe in the dark! How fucking good is that? He's brilliant.
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I see Atheists are fighting and killing each other again, over who doesn't believe in any God the most. Oh, no..wait.. that never happens.
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In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth . . . Then he said, Let there be light. Which means he made the entire universe in the dark! How fucking good is that? He's brilliant.
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A Christian telling an atheist they're going to hell is as scary as a child telling an adult they're not getting any presents from Santa.
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I see Atheists are fighting and killing each other again, over who doesn't believe in any God the most. Oh, no..wait.. that never happens.
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I'm a fang-toothed, blob-nosed, slouchy slob.
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A couple of people I knew went to university apart from me, but all the way through I was the smartest kid in the school. That's luck, but I was proud of it. And I was also proud of doing well without trying. As you get older, and it took me a long time to realise it, that's a disgusting attitude, revolting.
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Everything I do is somehow rooted in humanity. It's always about people; it's always about ego. It's always about desperation. It's quite existential. You know, 'Am I leading a good life?' That might be because I'm an atheist, and I think this is all we've got, so you better be nice. And have fun.
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I think you can make fun of anything except things people can't help. They can't help their race or their sex or their age, so you ridicule their pretension or their ego instead. You can ridicule ideas - ideas don't have feelings. You can ridicule an idea that someone holds without hurting them.
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My dad was a laborer. And he used to get up at 5:30 every morning. He worked for 50 years of his life, in all weathers for, by showbiz standards, petty cash. I remind myself of that when I feel a little bit spoiled or hard done by.
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I don't mind what people say about me as long as it's an opinion or the truth. If someone says, 'He's the worst comedian in the world,' that's fine. If someone says, 'His face makes me want to punch the TV,' that's fine. But if they say, 'Oh, and I know for a fact he hunts squirrels,' I go: no, no, no... that's a lie.
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Sometimes being old is used as an insult, which is bizarre because, if you're lucky, that's literally going to happen to you. It's a strange thing to gloat about: being born recently.
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Proper stupidity is fascinating.
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Karl Pilkington has the roundest head, I think, in the world. It's not technically a deformity, but I've never seen anything quite that spherical.
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How many times have we seen reality celebrities fall from grace - often through no fault of their own - and then go on a show like 'Celebrity Big Brother' and say, 'I want to show the public a different side of me.' And I'm screaming at the telly going, 'This is not therapy. This is voyeurism!'
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I don't know what Trump has to do to lose his supporters. It's like a religion. He's a school bully.
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I haven't had my teeth fixed, I haven't had a hair transplant. I haven't had a skin peel, tummy tuck. I've done literally nothing.
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I'm a scientist at heart, so I know how important the truth is. However inconvenient, however unattractive, however embarrassing, however shocking, the truth is the truth, and wanting it not to be true doesn't change things.
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Cynicism, to me, is trying to make people as unhappy as you are.
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