I want my tombstone to say that I won the Champions League with Barca.

On my left forearm, I've got a gothic cross with a tombstone in the center with the initials 'E' and 'G' for my friend, the late Eddie Guerrero.

Statistics on the dangers guns pose to the health of their owners and those who live with them suggest that I'd be safer selling my guns than reserving them for 'Tombstone II.'

Live so that when the final summons comes you will leave something more behind you than an epitaph on a tombstone or an obituary in a newspaper.

Fire Yourself. Outsource some of your life. Because you know what won't be cute on a tombstone? 'Her grind was impeccable, and she did it all by herself.'

I was never a western guy, but I happened upon 'Tombstone' one day on TV and was really sort of taken with it. It's one of those movies that, if it's on TV, I can't turn it off. I just have to watch the whole thing.

Having 'Oscar winner' on your tombstone is a great thing.

I'm not patient - and I'm getting more impatient as I get older - but I am disciplined about writing, and I want that on my tombstone: 'He wasn't patient, but he was disciplined.'

I hope that on my tombstone it says 'Born 1933, died 2043.' I hope that's my legacy.

I did not want my tombstone to read, 'She kept a really clean house.' I think I'd like them to remember me by saying, 'She opened government to everyone.'

My parents are avid supporters of me, and just hearing my name and the word 'Grammy' in the same sentence would be a dream come true. I mean, that's something you put on your tombstone.

I was briefly in the original version of 'Tombstone,' but I didn't make the final cut because that movie went through a couple of different permutations.

You acquire certain tastes. And if your taste happens to coincide with the majority of people, then you're in pretty good shape. But you're not always right. There were times when I stubbed my toe, and some will end up being on my tombstone - like 'Supertrain.'

Write 'judge of beautiful women' on my tombstone. I'd be quite happy.

I've had such a satisfying life professionally and personally. I hope my tombstone says, 'Never boring.'

I've always felt that, when I looked at my tombstone, it shouldn't say, 'Mehmet Oz banged out 10,000 open-heart operations.' I've probably done 5,000. Am I any better at it than 10,000? He shook his head. It's just a different number on the tombstone.

My closest friend, who died not long ago, is buried near Marx's grave in Highgate cemetery, so I see the gaggle of admirers laying roses at the foot of his tombstone regularly. I have never been tempted to leave flowers there myself. Great theories, shame about the practice. Marx did many things. But inventing class was not one of them.

I don't want my tombstone to say actress. I want it to say human being.

I always thought I'd like my own tombstone to be blank. No epitaph, and no name. Well, actually, I'd like it to say 'figment.'

On my tombstone, I want written: 'He never did 'Love Boat!'